My diet over the past twenty-four hours:
1. Friday Morning Breakfast
Large cafe latte. Brewed at home with my trusty Tassimo machine. One-third milk; one-third half-and-half; one-third espresso. Breakfast of champions, I tell you.
2. Friday Lunch
Five pieces of chocolate that I appropriated from Judge Borden's clerk, Lynn.
3. Friday Dinner
Beer and cigarettes. Too many beers; too many cigarettes (I'm trying to quit smoking, but the beer makes it difficult)(I'm trying to quit drinking, but the cigarettes make it difficult).
(Actually, that was at the Peoria Oktoberfest, not last night - but the thought remains the same.)
4. Friday Late-Night Snack
Nacho Cheese Doritos (Dude!), Lay's Potato chips, one bite of an uncooked Pop-Tart (frosted strawberry, naturally). More beer.
5. Breakfast This Morning
More Doritos (Nacho Cheese, of course, Dude), a McDonald's Sausage and Egg Biscuit with Hash Brown. Two large cafe lattes. No more beer, mercifully.
Of course, I should have gone to Hardee's for something like this:
Or perhaps, turn on the deep-fryer for something a bit more respectable:
Richard Simmons would be so proud.
(Oh, and I want to generate some hits on this post, so here's a cool picture of Johnny Depp:)
(And Julianne Nicholson:)
6. Now, What's for Lunch . . . ?